When i was in school, my friend locked her keys in her car. I walked by with another friend of mine (what we call a 'toaster'. lol). After five minutes with my friend, i knew i wasn't going to be able to date this guy. Why? He broke all the rules of what to do or say in a crisis.
So my friend had locked her keys in the car right, right? What does toaster say? "You locked your keys in the car?"
My friend, trying not to say 'duh' replies, "Yes"
"O"
Silence.
Then, "and you do not have the spare here?" (toaster again)
Even i wanted to hit him at this point. If she had the spare keys would she be on the road at school looking around helplessly and trying to resolve the situation?
I mean!
Look, people will always be in stressful situations and when that happens, please avoid saying or doing the following-
* STATING the obvious
When people are stressed or in trouble, they do not need you stating the obvious. Things like, "you are late", "you locked your keys in abi" are inviting a less than polite response. If you can't help, don't harm!
* ASKING Questions or Acting like you can help
IF you know you can't.
When someone is in need of help they are desperate. Don't use them for your own five minutes of bored fun by asking them questions about the issue when you know you can't help. That is time they could have been looking for someone who could actually help and you just succeeded in stressing them further.
WHat are you? A monster?
* BEING Logical
Okay Okay I know logic always seems like a good idea, but not when it serves no purpose other than yours.
Tuesday
Pic of the Day: Meet the Basketball-Loving Carters
And Blue Ivy just keeps getting cuter.
The Carters took time off their busy schedules to go catch a game yesterday.
Sunday
#ShortStorySunday Once a Year
Some people you are destined to keep meeting
If you believe in destiny
It could just be that its a small world and so you were bound to bump into them anyways!
But Shade believed in destiny.
The first time she met Tutu, she was fascinated.
He was tall
He had lovely hair
And he spoke well
That was always her weakness.
He was in university and he was in America; back home for something or the other. That was twenty years ago
She was at a friend's wedding. A little bored and ready to leave but saw a friend on her way out. The friend was at the same table with Tutu. Nothing mattered any longer; she just wanted to be around him, talking about nothing, something, everything.
And that's what they did.
This was in the days of no mobile phones nor 'social media' so they swapped landlines, and someone called the other, and after chatting back and forth for a bit, they set up a date.
And yet, inspite of both of their best intentions, they could never seem to get the date right.
Between them, they had no car, no licenses, and no clue as to what one could do for fun.
One day, she just asked a cousin to pick her up, she met up with him and they just wandered about in Victoria Island for a while without doing anything really.
The date sucked.
She felt it, and years later, when they spoke about it, she realised he had thought so as well..
Every so often, Tutu would come home, and they would bump into each other
Maybe at a club
Oh wait, always at a club.
They would talk, and try to hook up but never get round to it
But they always seemed to be able to stay in touch via email.
Cut to Lagos
December 2016.
Shade had gone through drama with her now-ex, Jim.
One day she meets a few friends up at a cafe. And once again, she bumped into Tutu.
Still tall (er)
Hair still beautiful (er)
Still speaking well (er)
Still damn all that and a bag of chips
They spoke over coffee, he took her number, and he called the next day, and they hung out
Five minutes into the 'date', she began to panic.
It felt like it wasn't working, like the date was going to suck again.
Infact, it did suck. Till they went outside to wait for a cab and it began raining
And they got completely soaked.
And somewhere between the thunder and the lightning, she realised that it never would matter how the dates themselves went, all that mattered was that she hung out with him.
He of course, went back again. He had just been home for christmas.
And this time, she won't stay in touch. She won't try to make it into more than what it is- a magical encounter that only happens once a year. and only by fate.
She would rather not know if he is dating someone (okay fine, he is, she checked).
She would rather just forget about Tutu till the next time she was sitting idly at a party, and then got a pat on the back...
For now, she is condemned to that excruciatingly beautiful place where memories are glorified, and everything is magnified.
If you believe in destiny
It could just be that its a small world and so you were bound to bump into them anyways!
But Shade believed in destiny.
The first time she met Tutu, she was fascinated.
He was tall
He had lovely hair
And he spoke well
That was always her weakness.
He was in university and he was in America; back home for something or the other. That was twenty years ago
She was at a friend's wedding. A little bored and ready to leave but saw a friend on her way out. The friend was at the same table with Tutu. Nothing mattered any longer; she just wanted to be around him, talking about nothing, something, everything.
And that's what they did.
This was in the days of no mobile phones nor 'social media' so they swapped landlines, and someone called the other, and after chatting back and forth for a bit, they set up a date.
And yet, inspite of both of their best intentions, they could never seem to get the date right.
Between them, they had no car, no licenses, and no clue as to what one could do for fun.
One day, she just asked a cousin to pick her up, she met up with him and they just wandered about in Victoria Island for a while without doing anything really.
The date sucked.
She felt it, and years later, when they spoke about it, she realised he had thought so as well..
Every so often, Tutu would come home, and they would bump into each other
Maybe at a club
Oh wait, always at a club.
They would talk, and try to hook up but never get round to it
But they always seemed to be able to stay in touch via email.
Cut to Lagos
December 2016.
Shade had gone through drama with her now-ex, Jim.
One day she meets a few friends up at a cafe. And once again, she bumped into Tutu.
Still tall (er)
Hair still beautiful (er)
Still speaking well (er)
Still damn all that and a bag of chips
They spoke over coffee, he took her number, and he called the next day, and they hung out
Five minutes into the 'date', she began to panic.
It felt like it wasn't working, like the date was going to suck again.
Infact, it did suck. Till they went outside to wait for a cab and it began raining
And they got completely soaked.
And somewhere between the thunder and the lightning, she realised that it never would matter how the dates themselves went, all that mattered was that she hung out with him.
He of course, went back again. He had just been home for christmas.
And this time, she won't stay in touch. She won't try to make it into more than what it is- a magical encounter that only happens once a year. and only by fate.
She would rather not know if he is dating someone (okay fine, he is, she checked).
She would rather just forget about Tutu till the next time she was sitting idly at a party, and then got a pat on the back...
For now, she is condemned to that excruciatingly beautiful place where memories are glorified, and everything is magnified.
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