#MondayMotivation Three things I am Taking away from Leonardo DiCaprio's Oscar win

Last time the Grammys were on, i was determined to catch it live. When my alarm went off, i killed it and stayed in bed. But this time around with the Oscars, i did not even need my alarm to wake me up. I knew i did not want to read all about it on twitter or the news feed, and fine it would repeat but no, i wanted to see the moment Leonardo DiCaprio finally won his oscar, live.

Leonardo DiCaprio is a pretty known name if you like
- movies
- fine guys who age gracefully
- interesting stories.

This was the guy who transitioned from child star in sit-coms to movie star, with movies like, "What's eating Gilbert Grape", and then the iconic role in "Titanic" (for which he actually did not get nominated.). Since then, he has gone to play it all- billionaire, criminal and undercover police officer.

And through it all, no Oscar.
Did he lose to less deserving people? Of course not. He lost out to Forest Whitaker for Last King of Scotland, in the year gave us the powerful performance in Blood Diamonds, and to Jamie Foxx for 'Ray' when he was nominated for 'The Aviator'.

But this year, you could feel the almost-cosmic shift. The world waited as  ... read out the nominees list and you could tell even she was excited because she did not pause but said his name out quickly and then the world clapped.

First thing i took away from Leonardo's win was his composure. There were no hysterics, no long speech about himself and how it had been a long time coming, just an unusually cool and calm winner.

But what else did i take from it?

Keep Working
This one seems easy. Leonardo DiCaprio kept making movies even when the world was sure he should have won for this or been nominated for that!
Whether it is 'Staff of the Month' or a Grammy that you lose out on, work like awards don't matter. In the end, the only true reward is in you.

Stay Gracious
I saw a facebook post where someone pointed out that Leo could have been justified in giving out interviews once or twice about the unfairness of awards but nope. Leonardo has stayed gracious. Gracious in defeat (showing up everytime he has been nominated) and gracious in victory (celebrating his co-stars and speaking up for a cause in his acceptance speech).

It is like Beyonce says on 'Formation". "Stay gracious..."

It can be any stone
This was is funny. But you know when Leonardo got nominated this year (and won last nigth), as expected, the nay sayers showed up. We heard this was not his best performance, the other nominees were better and so on.

But now move on from those ones first and switch to you. Imagine tweeting the dopest tweet of your social media existence or drawing a masterpiece then stepping back and expecting the applause. You are shocked. Wait what? I sweated blood to design this dress! How dare you not bow down?!

Then one day you put all your effort in something as you usually do, but it is not neccessarily your best work and you are not neccessarily the most qualified. But still, that is THE ONE that gets you attention.

Isn't that just the funniest thing ever?

So brethren, and brethrenesses.., tell me this-
Have you ever had to wait for something for sooooooo long? How did it feel when you got it?

#EventWednesday Olorisupergal turned 6... (Not the girl, the company)

Did i ever tell you guys i lost my voice? Like literally open mouth and no sound. I was quite worried o, and now i understand why people insure the funniest things.

But what does that have to do with Olorisupergal at 6.

Let me jump to the beginning first.

olorisupergal.com marked its sixth year anniversary in Lagos at a get together attended by stars like Gbenga Adeyinka, Tee A and Sisi Yemmie. Thankfully, i did not have to gate crash because i was invited to also host the event and boy was i happy.

Till, i lost my voice. Tried everything (and we need to talk about some great natural remedies for your voice) but it didn't clear in time so i was glad comedian, Gbenga Adeyinka could take over and host it instead. Fun Fact: Do you know the owner of olorisupergal, Tosin Ajibade, once worked for Gbenga?

Olorisupergal has grown from being one of Nigeria’s first blogspot hubs into a full urban lifestyle force in Nigeria. Olorisupergal has produced New Media Conference, a travel website ‘Travel Africa Story’ which will be a year in less than 2 weeks. Travel Africa Story was created out of Tosin Ajibade's passion for travelling with her partner Adekunle Owolabi.

Tosin Ajibade, founder of olorisupergal.com, was named as one of Nigeria’s most influential women in 2015. From news to fashion, arts and culture and lifestyle, Olorisupergal.com is one of Nigeria’s leading hubs for pop culture and urban lifestyle.

Guests at the get together were treated to lots to eat and drink, plus a little insight into how it all began, some of her challenges, and what is to come. I asked her how often she blogged when she first began and she said she didn't start off with a schedule, especially since when she started she would have to look for a business centre, the internet was a lot slower (yes folks, internet used to be a lot slower) and so on but she tends to blog ALL the time because there is always something happening.


I had saved my voice well enough to be able to speak about when i first met Olori- i had just got on radio and she wanted to do an interview. She was tenacious and we did it. One of my first back then.

Was excited to take selfies with everyone from SisiYemmie to DatGuyKofo and DemolaExpoze, and also eat cake. Plus, i got to go with goody bags courtesy TravelAfricaStory, which by the way, is Tosin Ajibade's other 'huzzle'.

Congratulations to her once again!

#Monday WIN tickets to the Emotional Masterclass

What will you do to move your personal or corporate brand to where you really want it to be?

I'm looking forward to attending the Emotional Masterclass session this Saturday and good news, i can bring YOU along.

But why should you come?

Well, let me ask; have you taken the right steps to enable you achieve your desired outcomes?

Studies have shown that 85% of life's success is dependent on Emotional Intelligence. This event, "The Power of Emotions: Using positive emotions to build your brand” is guaranteed to teach you how taking charge of your emotions can help you maximize your individual or corporate brand.

Human beings are ruled by their emotions and if you can master this for yourself and others, you will always succeed. Often times, people will connect with or patronize your brand based on some type of emotions you can evoke in them.

Nobel Prize winning psychologist, Daniel Kahneman, found that people would rather do business with a person they like and trust rather than someone they don’t, even if the likeable person is offering a lower quality product or service at a higher price.

With this in mind, rather than focus on just IQ (responsible for 15% of life's success), you ought to make an investment in strengthening your Emotional Intelligence, Moral Intelligence and Body Intelligence. These concepts are fresh to the African market but will ultimately position your brand as a pioneer.

Emotional Branding however, requires the right tools and methodologies and this is what the workshop brings to the fore - a holistic approach with Brand Strategist, Charles O'Tudor;  Star Actress, Dakore Akande, Former WIMBIZ Chair, Osayi Alile , Life & Business Design Strategist, Steve Harris  and The Catalyst, Lanre Olusola.

The event will focus on four focal areas; How to Use your Emotions, How to understand The Power of Psychological & Emotional Branding with a perspective on the future of personal and corporate branding, Deadly Emotions and How to Overcome Them and lastly, Women and their Emotions – A Liability or an Asset?

A major part of the event will be a special 2-3 hours of hands-on group and one- on-one therapy sessions handled by a team of Certified Life Coaches and Therapists after every talk. This section is designed to further provide personalised solutions for attendees with emotional challenges.

If you care about your business, career and brand; you ought to be there. VISIT 

http://app.getresponse.com/click.html?x=a62b&lc=mXrAo&mc=IQ&s=CEfPb8&u=c8ZW&y=P&

 for more details and to initiate your registration NOW.

Fees: N15,000 only (Corporate discounts available)
Bank Details: 0046488619, Olusola Lanre, Access Bank

(But great news - www.tosynbucknor.blogspot.com is giving out free tickets to this. Want one? Leave a comment with your name and why you want one)

Event Details
Date: Saturday 27th February, 2016
Time: 10am
Venue: The Lekki Coliseum, Lekki Phase 1

Register: www.the-ultimatewoman.com , registration@olcang.com. info@olcang.com. Call 08077077000 or 08055151504 for enquiries

#ShortStorySunday Instant attraction

It was Day 245 of being single in Las Gidi and I was headed for one of those cocktail parties that someone invites you to, maybe because they have a quota they have to fill up or maybe because they genuinely want you there.

I didn't mind. It was Friday night and I was bored.

Plus it was the kind of party that was sure to have free booze. And hey, what girl doesn't like free booze?

Blue summery dress that translates well from day to night? Check
Pink shoes with kitten heels because aint nobody got time for pain? Check
Some make up, some perfume and lip gloss for the road? Check.

I left home like I usually do when I go out-  open mind closed legs.

I had been at the party for like forty minutes before I spotted him. It was, as I expected, one of those quota invitations so I said all but five words to the person who invited me. I did see a lot of famous people, including the actor, Gbade Ademiro. She was so chic.

There had been a paucity of nibbles, with the waiters bringing out small sandwiches, little crepes and a lot of cheese. I should have eaten before leaving, my stomach said, not too kindly. And then, like someone had heard me, I saw them setting up a barbecue. Thank you universe!!!

Of course most people like me, did the "I didn't see them set up, I just happen to want to move outside" dance and we nearly came to blows reaching for the barbecue. And that's  when he reached out and became my hero. Grabbed himself a plate and one for me too. Then when get got some of the chicken, he made sure I got some too. I was so thankful I almost fell to my knees... O wait. That's a movie.

So we began talking. This guy and I. He was easy to talk to and the chemistry was instant. We went from what we do (he's a doctor) to the state of the nation (when is Buhari visiting Nigeria again) to music (we would buy a Paul album for sure, and go for Peter concerts) to everything.

We spoke about Nollywood and I mentioned Gbade was around. He said he had seen her too and was a fan. So we both decided to go say hi. Fingers crossed she isn't as stuck up as she is beautiful though.

But she wasn't. She was gracious. And then she asked, "so how long have you guys been dating?". Ha ha ha. I blushed. Or I think I did. We both denied it furiously. "We just met" I protested.

She refused to believe us. "Yeah right. You guys just met and the chemistry is this great? Tell me something else".
Try as we could, we couldn't- she wasn't having it.

We left her and it didn't even turn awkward. Doc and I just kept right on talking.

So now it's 10pm and I really do want to leave. Plus, isn't there a rule as to how long a single girl can chat with a single guy she just met at a party for?

I don't know but if there wasn't, I was about to invent one.

So I said I was leaving. And then...
Two pecks and he was off.

Wait.
What just happened.

Isn't that the part where he asks for my number and then calls me tomorrow and we go and see a movie then again on Sunday and by harmattan we are married?

Wait what?
Why is he leaving?

I swear, this guy didn't even ask my name!!! Like my full name! How is he going to find me on frigging facebook if he doesn't even know my name???

(So this story has two endings. Tell me which you prefer)

ALTERNATE ENDING 1
I was devastated and walked dejectedly to my car. A black car stopped and it was the actress. I said, almost in tears, "he didn't ask for my number". She gave a sad smile and rolled the glass up.

And then drove off.
Leaving me... Alone

ALTERNATE ENDING 2
I was devastated and walked dejectedly to my car. A black car stopped and it was the actress. I said, almost in tears, "he didn't ask for my number". She gave a sad smile and said, "that's because he already has mine. Then she rolls the glass down fully and I see Doc.
And that's when it clicked.
The actress had got married last year... To a doctor.

Shade it like Taylor...

Here is a guide to shading like Taylor Swift.

1. When the 'enemy' says or does something, DO NOT REACT.

Taylor famously tweeted at Nicki when she thought Nicki Minaj was taking shots at her last year and that backfired so now when Kanye's song and diss came up this year, our girl didn't say a thing.

Remember, the whole world is refreshing your page to see what you will say or do so KEEP YOUR COOL.

2. Win

Instead of wasting your energy on bad blood, channel it into you. Rise, win, and succeed. Afterall, you know what they say about success right?

Congrats to Taylor on her grammy wins last night. She is now the only woman to have won a grammy for 'Best Album', twice.

While we may not all win grammys in Versace, we can still celebrate our successes and shade!

3. Empower and Shade the beep off!

Taylor Swift's acceptance at the Grammys was on the face of it, an encouragement for women and an admonishment of the 'male dominated' system.

But if you of course know the background to it, with Kanye insisting he made Taylor famous on his song, "Famous", then you see what she is really saying.

Taylor in one speech, told the Grammys and the Music industry we need more diversity for women, boasted about being the only woman to have won Best Album twice, encouraged women and girls, AND told Kanye to sit down.

Queen T anyone?

Now you've learnt how to shade it like Taylor, go ye forth and enjoy!!!

Excerpt from Taylor's speech: 

"As the first woman to win Album of the Year at the Grammys twice, I wanna say to all the young women out there: there are going to be people along the way who will try to undercut your success, or take credit for your accomplishments or your fame, but if you just focus on the work and you don’t let those people sidetrack you, someday when you get where you’re going, you’ll look around and you’ll know that it was you and the people who love you that put you there, and that will be the greatest feeling in the world,”

What I Am Loving At The Moment... Love, Make Up Artistes and Tahari

It is Valentine's Day tomorrow so that is a great opportunity for me to talk about love.

Yeah right.

Like Top Radio 90.9 on air personality, Yomi Kazeem said to me the other day, "you are a tomboy, you talk about sports, not love". Na wa o!

But, i do look forward to spending time with my best friend, and here is hoping i get a teddy bear. Lord knows i have left him enough hints. I would tell you what i got him but he reads my blog so final 'hint' babes- TeddyBear!

Apart from teddy bears, what else am i loving at the moment?

Make Up Artistry

When i apply my make up myself, i am more about doing it quick and simple

When i sit down with a professional though, i let them do the work. Most times i do not look into the mirror till they finish because i enjoy the transformation from cute to va va voom!
Naija's make up game is off the hinges and kudos to everyone who is doing it well! Special shout out to my three favourites!

MzPreyeMakeovers
I met Preye when i did my first proper professional shoot. She is creative, has good energy and also styles hair so well.

MzPreye did my hair and make up for this shoot

IDazzle Makeovers
IDazzle is fun to be with, patient and non intrusive, and i love that she has a signature look.

OTM (Abuja)
When i went to Abuja for #Obi2016, i discovered OTM. Now i wish she would move to Lagos permanently because she is that good! She is professional, fast and leaves you natural but glam. So Abuja folks, lucky you!

Tahari
When you've got just thirty minutes to shop, you tend to panic. And panic I did for a bit while trying to pick a dress. The ones I found were either too big, or too small. (I'm learning that my size is not 'usual'. My jeans tend to be too long or my tops don't fit. The reason is most off-the-racks have a basic idea of how people look).

But I digress.

So I'm looking around and then I it!

Something about this dress made me fall in love, something about it screamed 'Natalie Wood'! So I tried it on and knew I had to have it.

What I paired it with
* I asked Biola of One Touch Makeovers for something glam since the dress was so simple. We went with plum lips and nude eyes.

* I forgot my jewellery box in Lagos but thankfully had these green pieces by Leesabeth Jewels on hand. Green on green? It worked!!!

* Black shoes with white studs.

What it can also be paired with

* Silver would give more contrast and pop

* Yellow is riskier but if it works (like yellow shoes), then it will be so bold and beautiful.

Let me see your best look this week and also feel free to s.h.a.r.e how you'd have styled this dress.

And o, what are YOU loving at the moment?

#MondayMotivation If you want to go far...

"If you want to go fast, go alone.
If you want to go far, go together"

I have started this post five times. I kid you not. And that in itself is what the post is about. I know what I want to say, I can see it and say it, but to turn it into a post that makes sense and conveys my thoughts? A little harder.

I used to think this was a function of the creative mind, but I saw the trait in different ways. My cousin and I would ponder over a problem and I'd be there with a thousand solutions, but if you asked me to actually do those things, I'd be like, 'err'. He on the other hand, can do these things in little or no time.

In theory, it's also why I can never seem to tidy my room. Or maybe that's ocd. And I digress.

But back to my story.

This trait as I like to call it is 'Big Picture'.

Some people see the big picture while some see fine details. Some people are able to dream up grand ideas and some are able to plug those holes and build beneath the dreams. In an ideal world, much like thinkers and doers, Mr Big Picture and Miss Fix It would work together and create magic. This rarely happens though for other reasons like not spotting this kismet, refusing to put pride aside, wanting the glory and more.

But when it does happen, like to some extent with Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniak, imagine the genius the world is treated to!
(Ps, at this point I have to plead with you to please read the Steve Jobs autobiography whenever you can).

For the longest time, I hired or worked with people much like me- dreamers. We would sit for hours and come up with grand plans but I could never really then put the structure down and that would always blow up in our faces. I'm learning to spot the people I should work with though and there's such a difference.

This trait can show up in your personal life or professional one. I blame it for why it takes me months to arrange my wardrobe, especially if I move or travel. In my head, I know where everything should go but I find the actual putting things in place to be so distracting. I've met people though who can arrange their rooms in five minutes flat and I'm like uhn?

The smart thing to do is partner with people who we can go far with. 'Partner' in this post is used loosely. I'm not asking you to give over fifty percent of every idea you have to people. I do encourage you though to be selective with who you work with and surround yourself with.

If you find that you need help putting things in place then you should get people who can do that. And if by any chance you're so good at fixing and doing things but need a bit of direction and 'big picture', don't be ashamed to ask for help.

In the end, do what makes you happy; that is my bottomline.

#EventWednesday Coloured Myself Rad last weekend!

Last weekend i ran.

Okay i lie.
I jogged a little, walked a lot and danced a bit.

But it was all fun and it felt goooood!

It was for the first ever #ColourMeRad5k in Lagos, Nigeria and it kicked off from Bar Beach at 4pm on Sunday January 31st with Freedom Park as the destination.

The turn out was impressive and everyone looked colourful- painted nails, running gear and all.

Colour me Rad is a 5kilometre race and is loosely based on the Hindu Festival of Colours. As such, participants are sprayed with colour at the start, at the final stop and various points in between.

I was ready for all the colours and by the time i got to Freedom Park (last but for a few kids and their parents behind me), i was more colourful than the rainbow.

#MondayMotivation Are you Shy or Silly?

Are you shy or silly?

Okay I apologise, this header is a bit harsh. But hey, it could have been worse. I could have said 'stupid'. Forgive me, I just really really like my alliterations.

Let me explain what I mean though.

I am a shy person.

* I'm giving you a few moments to faint and not believe me here*

But I am though. And it's a cross when you don't know how to deal with it. There are actually a lot of media personalities who are shy as well but the beauty of it is we can hide behind fierce alter egos who do the work for us. But give us a more intimate social situation and we become awkward. That's why sometimes you meet a celebrity who doesn't say a word to you.

For me, my job makes me larger than life. People see me away from my mic and expect to see me shouting "Areaaaa" or something. Lol. Meanwhile me I'd much rather be in a corner counting the dots on my trainers than looking into your eyes.

Ah, eye contact. This thing kills us, the shy ones. Add to that, talking to a small group of people, walking into a meeting last, addressing a small audience, or talking about ourselves.

There is something I have noticed about shy people though- we get misunderstood a lot. If I got a naira for everytime I have heard someone I know to be shy described as 'snobbish', 'aloof', 'proud' or worse, I'd be richer than Dangote.

It was really bad in university, coming from Queens' College and watching people taken down unfairly because their shyness was mistaken for looking down on others.

Unfortunately, some people actually let being shy become a crutch they lean on and blame their bad behaviour on. Like when because you are shy you refuse to acknowledge people at a social, formal, or other gathering.

The thing is, the world will not always understand your shyness and it's easy to demand the world meets and loves us as we are but unless you plan to work indoors only (o what a life), us shy people have to learn a few tricks to cope with the real world.

These are some of my tips for you but you can google and read up more things to do and practise.

1. Rehearse and practise walking into a room and saying hello. Do it at home where you are alone from time to time till you master it.

2. Smile. People will quite often forgive the biggest infractions if you smile at them. Walking into a room frowning or 'being yourself' (which is a straight face to you but a frown to others) is a big downer. So when you meet people or walk into a room, SMILE!!!

3. Don't over compensate.
It's easy to spot an insecure person- they are more often than not, the ones boasting. So as a shy person, becareful not to go over the top in trying to fit in. Sometimes we just try too hard.

I hope this helps you. Feel free to leave a comment